Single in L.A.

As I say here often, I’m friends with a lot of guys. And with my friends, male and female, I happen to be very encouraging towards them in all aspects. I also tend to flirt a bit, but I thought I was keeping that separate from my friendships. Apparently I thought wrong.

I need to find a balance. I used to be Queen Meanie. If you liked me, I didn’t encourage you much, just made you feel lucky to be in my presence. These days I’m more embracing of people (well, men) that reach out to me because even though I may not be interested in dating, you never know how cool (or un-cool) some people are until you get to know them.

At the same time I can’t fake it. If I’m not interested, I don’t pretend because I’m not into leading people astray. Am I rambling? Ok, let me be more specific.

Somehow I befriended this guy, D. We went to school together at some point. He said “what’s up?” I said “hey.” And we reconnected. Well, I thought we were engaging in friendly banter for a while. Then D started calling me. Errr??? It began as friendly chit chat that I always cut short because I really don’t talk on the phone. I text. I e-mal. I get together. But phone time is reserved for the family back at home, basically.

Anyhow, D now has taken to sending me these “thinking about you “ style texts in the morning, afternoon and throughout the day. Huh??? This morning’s message made if very CLEAR that he thinks we have “something” going on.

How do I get into these situations? A couple of years ago I had a male friend at home that I spoke to almost daily. Suddenly he started ending the phone calls by saying “I love and miss you.” HUH??? Wait. When did we get to that point? How do you fall in love with me and we’re not spending time together, rather we’re just shooting the shit?? I was confused then. And I’m super confused now.

There’s an age old debate about men and women not being able to be just friends. I’m going to start believing in that soon because my male friends almost always end up coming out of left field with me. I am Haute and everything, but sheesh!

Has anyone else experienced anything like that? You think you’re just being good natured and you look up one day and you’re in a pseudo relationship???? How can I get out of this situation without hurting feelings or seeming like a bitch??

What? You heard me right! I just got a text saying this and did a quick bit of research. It’s confirmed! HA! Music to my ears.

And in honor of the occasion The Cheesecake Factory is selling slices of its delicious original for $1.50. Ahhh…. My thighs might be upset, but there just so happens to be Cheesecake Factory within walking distance of my humble abode. I’ll walk over, get my slice and walk back home. Doesn’t that make it okay?

Oh, I may as well get my favorite, Miso Salmon, while I’m there.

Celebrities love to buy, open and invest in business ventures to build their wealth.  Love that!  The most popular venture being restaurants, bars, lounges and the like.  I have, on several occasions (how can one not, living in L.A.?), patronized such establishments. 

On my last day in DC/MD/VA my BFF, Angel, decided we should meet some former high school classmates for lunch.  Her choice of venue: Sideline Sports Bar, owned by Washington Redskin’s Lavar Arrington located in Largo, MD at The Blvd. 

What can I say?  The calamari was…good.  That’s about it.  The décor was as expected of a sports bar: big screen TVs, wraparound bar and large booths. I can imagine this venue being a happening spot on Fridays and game nights, especially for groupies (male and female) hoping to spy Lavar and possibly one of his athlete friends.  Apparently, Sideline also likes to employ those giving off a groupie-esqe vibe.  Our waitress topping that list. 

Apparently the number one requirement to work there was to have “model good looks.” She was cute. I’ll give her that.  Did she know what she was doing?  Different story altogether.

The service was poor, at best.  Groupina, our server, looked and acted as if she had partied the night away into the wee hours of the morning.  She may have taken off her pumps and hopped right into her Hooterish uniform. She could hardly be bothered with our piddle-y orders.  She forgot everything that every person in our party of four requested. 

Erin ordered a burger with one specification: grilled onions.  She got a burger with the fixings including a single ring of RAW red onion.  Angel order a burger as well and asked for a specific type of cheese and bacon to be added.  She received a burger identical to Erin’s.  She flagged down Groupina, who was sedately resting on a bar stool.  Angel informed her of her mistake.  No apologies, no nothing just “Oh.” 

Groupina then brings Angel a saucer with an ICE COLD piece of cheese and a slice of bacon.  Gee, thanks. 

I ordered the crab bisque as I’d heard it was excellent.  And it was very tasty.  It also made me sick, sick, sick once I made it to the airport an hour later. Maybe the cream was bad? 

The restaurant was pretty empty so it isn’t as if Groupina was overwhelmed by the crowd.  To top off our lovely experience Lavar Arrington made two appearances.  Now, I’m used to good service. Managers and owners flock over, especially when the place is damn near empty, to assure that you’ve enjoyed your experience. Not Arrington. Lavar lazily hung out at the hostess stand (maybe flirting with Groupina), walked back and forth to the back office.  Not once did he even smile at the two parties dining in his establishment. 

Note: if you’re a public figure trying to have a successful business venture, you might want to learn something about the industry to which your business belongs.  Restaurants are a part of the HOSPITALITY industry.  I.e. you should be as hospitable as possible.  And train your staff to do the same.  Sometimes the gracious disposition of staff can make up for sub par entrées . That little gem is on the house. 

I nearly missed my flight waiting for Groupina to come back and check on us, bring the check, cash us out and bring back the receipts. Harriet Tubman probably navigated the Underground Railroad faster than Groupina waited on our clan. 

If you live in the DC/MD/VA area and are looking for a great dining experience, don’t go to Sideline Sports Bar. I was not impressed.  But do feel free to head on over there if you want good wings, to watch the game and hang out.

Every now and then these VIP invites.  I’ll post it here since I can’t make it out.

Marleaux gives you a Designer alternative to Sergio Rossi Painted Pumpes -Lolo’s Cube

Happy 1st Birthday Street Anthem! - Street Anthem

Giving Awards for the Most Racist Person of the Century - Yo Daily Dose

Swagger’s Back - Swagger Style

The best prank ever! - The Nu’s Report

Gran Patron Platinum; What do you know about that? - An Advanced Guide to Being Professionally Fabulous

Sephora really can make the summer better! - Charming But Single

Speed Dating - Caught on Tape! - Single is the New Relationship

Two weeks ago today I was sprinkling DC with all kinds of Midwest-goes-Hollywood Hauteness. Hair was freshly cut, layers bouncing and I was well rested enough to hit the streets. The streets = Lotus Lounge.

Lotus is unassuming enough on the outside. Amidst a block full of old brick storefronts sits a similar building with only one trace of difference. The sign. A single lotus flower (like above). Upon walking in and taking the stairs down we saw immediately that Lotus was, indeed, different than it’s drab neighbors.

We got there early to enjoy a sushi happy hour menu filled with salmon sashimi, spicy tuna rolls, Sakatinis and Sake Margaritas. Now, I’m a Cali. girl (by default). With access to some of the best sushi outside of Okinawa, I’m somewhat of an aficionado (humor me here). The sushi was good. Not great. But not bad either. It was fresh and tasty and hit my sushi spot – which needed to be hit.

The piece de resistance (say that with a French accent) actually came at official club door opening hour. At 10 pm the bar became FLOODED with patrons. Five minutes before it was bare. What happened at 10?

Ciroc hosts the bar for one full hour of $1 drinks. Yes! That’s right. Now, I’m a vodka girl (tonics and gimlets with extra lime to be exact). My number one being Ketel One. Number two: Grey Goose. Anything else just wouldn’t be civilized. Oh, but it would be. I must say: Ciroc is pretty smooth (probably due to the French distilling it with grapes); so smooth that it sneaks right up on you. So don’t get carried away with the $1 drinks.

The music was great (the best west coast spinner has nothing on this guy). Very nice atmosphere and décor – I’m a club/lounge/restaurant snob. I need décor. And ambience. How’s cold clouds of steam shooting up sporadically throughout the night for ambience? I loved it. And the fellas…weren’t so bad either.

So, if you’re in Washington D.C. and looking for something to do tonight, head to Lotus. Get there early, enjoy some sushi in a big, plush, wrap-around banquette. And at 9:55 head to the bar and hold down a spot. Ciroc is treating. Until 11 pm that is. Go tonight. I don’t know how long the Ciroc is going to flow.

Lotus is located at 1420 K St. in Washington D.C. Please drink responsibly

Mario Lopez and his Dancing With the Stars girlfriend, Karina Smirnoff, broke it off in June. And a few days later People featured him as 2008’s Hottest Bachelor. Had they pre-leaked the break-up news or what? Hmmm.

Anyway, the main photo, got me wondering…

I’ll be the first to admit that I used to swoon for his sweet dimpled smile when he played AC Slater on Saved by the Bell. Zack Morris who? It was all about AC. Any woman would be lying if they said his hotness was lost on them back then. Lying!

Mario’s relationship history has been bumpy. And apparently he’s known as a bit of a cad around these streets. For instance, he and ex wife Ali Landry finally tied the knot after six years of dating. Ali then divorced Mario two weeks later after friends provided proof of his long time philandering ways.

Whatever. I’m not trying to be in the man’s bedroom business (maybe I am?). I only know that he’s HOT and single. Lopez serves as a correspondent on Extra.

One more picture (courtesy of NY Post) in case you still doubt the man’s hotness. Sigh…

It’s been a long week, so I’m sorry that the posting has been staggered. I’m taking the weekend to re-group after last week’s trip. I told you guys I was getting old, right? Well imagine 7 nights of going to bed extra late, waking up extra early and doing more than a little two step all night long…I need rest. Not to mention playing mega catch up at my real j-o-b.

Suffice it to say. I’m in writing mode for the weekend and plan to pre-post for the full week ahead.

What you can expect:

Reviews: DC Clubs Lotus and Ibiza; Restaurants: Coastal Flats and Sideline (owned by Washington Redskin’s Lavar Arrington).

More detailed accounts of those booty grinding men on the east coast too (maybe not too much detail though – gotta leave something to the imagination).

And, of course, a few Single in L.A. profiles!

Enjoy the weekend!

The reviews are in, and they’re mostly mixed. CNN’s“Black in America” special debuted last night. I don’t discuss race much here, mostly because it’s irrelevant (as far as my specific social culture- more specifically the ideals I ascribe to). But of course, race issue are very relevant in the overall scheme of things.

I won’t get too deep. But something came up in last night’s airing that got me thinking about my own life (and current “situations” I’m involved in). Discussing things on a large scale is fine, but I like to banter with people. Not about far off hypothetical, idealistic concepts, but how things really feel and seem to us – in real life.

Interracial dating: how do you feel about it? Living in the ethereal melting pot, one would think this is not an issue. I see far more interracial couple than I do of those belonging to the same race. For the most part, it doesn’t affect me. But living in a melting pot doesn’t mean that everyone is into the mixing and mingling thing. Quite the contrary. Los Angeles can be very segregated socially, demographically and idealistically.

Being a single girl, I choose not to close any doors. I date who I like, who I’m attracted to and who treats me well. That could be anyone. And since I seem to be a Black Man Repellent, what other choices do I have? Date outside of my race, or don’t date at all.

I’m going to be honest though. There is a very clear double standard. I can’t state the oppositions side of things. But from my personal experience Black men seem to take offense when Black women date outside of their race. I laugh at that (for many, many reasons).

I’m interested in hearing some global perspectives. How do you feel about interracial dating? Is the dialog dated and unnecessary? Or, do you just want to get it all out in the open once and for all? How is it looked upon in your culture/racial group? Or even your neck of the woods? Speak! Your opinions are going to help me with another post that had been brewing in the Much Ado pot which will likely be posted here.

You guys (or whomever is behind the automated spam machine) are the worst!

I appreciate your efforts. I really do. We all have to find a way to get the word out on what we’re doing. How about you pay for advertisements? How about targeting blogs related to your products??? How about leaving it up to the many, many drug companies and their respective pharmaceutical sales reps???? Please, stop spamming me!

I returned from my trip to DC to see that I had a whopping 180 comments to moderate. Excited, I was! I didn’t’ want my traffic to fall off while the blog was unattended. Then I go into the moderation queue only to be inundated with “buy soma,” “do you need xanax?”” prescription and generic Viagra available NOW.” And apparently others have gotten wind of this trend: “payday advance today!” “earn your degree online in as little as 12 months.” Someone got really clever: “Tired of being single on the west coast? We understand! Try *********singles.com TODAY!”

Well, I’m tired of it! It’s been going on for awhile but I must say that I was most annoyed yesterday. It took 2 hours for me to “spam” those comments and block the IP’s. Unfortunately they are always sent from a different IP so blocking really does nothing. ***You’re taking away time from my happy hours and shopping trips***

STOP SPAMMING ME! I love attention (some may call me a real ham), but sheesh.

I don’t need ephedra, Viagra or xanax (well I talked to my shrink about xanax, so I don’t need YOU shoving it down my throat). I don’t need to earn a speedy degree online – got a real one 6 years ago. I could use a little extra cash, but mommy and daddy do deposits directly into my account free of charge.

Thank you, but no thank you. I know this will fall on deaf automated robotic program ears, but I had to rant!